Monday, 26 January 2015 12:18
partlyopenbook: Not me. :) (read)
[personal profile] partlyopenbook
While looking for another document on the computer, I came across an .rtf of these smile-worthy phrases. Enjoy!

Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one.

A word to the wise is unnecessary. - La Rouchefoucauld

All generalisations are dangerous, even this one.

A watched clock never boils.

Champagne for my true friends and true pain for my sham friends!

Cole's Axiom: The sum of the intelligence on the planet is a constant. The population is growing.

Did you know that dolphins are so intelligent that within only a few weeks of captivity, they can train Americans to stand at the very edge of the pool and throw them fish.

George Washington's brother was the uncle of our country.

I started out with nothing... I still have most of it.

If an infinite number of rednecks in the back of an infinite number of pickup trucks shoot an infinite number of shotgun rounds at an infinite number of highway signs, they will eventually produce a complete version of Hamlet in braille.

If there was any logic in this world, it would be men who ride side-saddle, not women.

Pandemonium was a word invented by Lewis Carroll, naming the capital of Hell.

Roget's Thesaurus rules, dominates, regulates, OK, all right, adequately.

Some people have a way with words, others not have way.

The future has many names: for the fearful it's the unknown, for the reckless it's the adventure, for the pessimists it's the unattainable. For the brave, it is opportunity.

The more you cry, the less you have to pee.

Time is money, money is the root of all evil, and knowledge is power. Therefore, procrastination is the key to world peace.

Whoever said nothing is impossible never tried slamming a revolving door.

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